STRANGE de JIM’S ZINGERS COLLECTION SEPTEMBER 17 2010

STRANGE de JIM’S ZINGERS COLLECTION SEPTEMBER 17, 2010

Strangie to Jay Leno: “Finding a bargain can give the same excitement as sex. That’s true. Women can shop all day and never be satisfied. Men, two minutes and they’re out of there.”

September Strangies: Leno 4, Ferguson 2, Letterman 2, Kimmel 2, Fallon 1, Colbert 1, Stewart 1

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By Strange de Jim
Beep beep! Love from Strange

(All but Leno, Fallon & Ferguson in reruns)

Strangie to Jay Leno: “Finding a bargain can give the same excitement as sex. That’s true. Women can shop all day and never be satisfied. Men, two minutes and they’re out of there.”

Jay Leno: “Parents are going to cut back on Halloween costume expense this year by just taping cell phones to their kids’ ankles and sending them out as Lindsay Lohan, who, by the way, just tested positive for Paris Hilton’s gum.” “The economy’s so bad Lady Gaga’s wearing leftovers.” “A medical marijuana dispensary in California is offering marijuana-infused ice cream. Cut out the middleman. Their cracksicles did so well.” Jay and Jim Norton gave audience members love advice. Jim: “Normally when a girl breaks up with me it’s through the legal system. And I break up with a girl the old fashioned way. I sleep with her sister.” Woman: “My husband gets me to have sex by saying it’s a workout, but he’s not losing weight. Am I being duped?” Jay: “Yes. No workout lasts only two minutes.” Jim: “Congratulations, Jay. You’ve doubled your time.” Guest Joel McHale about Betty White being on “Community:” “She was very sensual in her sex scenes with me.”

Jimmy Fallon: “Ryan Seacrest will announce the three new ‘American Idol’ judges. Then he’ll announce the three remaining viewers.” “A survey found only 25% of women are satisfied with their sex life. Although up to half those women may have faked their answer.” “NY Gov. candidate Carl Paladino said Manhattan has smug, self-important, pampered elitists. God, he sounds just like my butler.” “Joaquin Phoenix revealed his two years of acting crazy was just performance art for a movie. Mel Gibson said, ‘Uh, yeah, me too.’” “Paris Hilton bought 20 rabbits that were going to be fed to snakes. Then the snakes saved the rabbits from being adopted by Paris Hilton.” Guest Will Arnett: “My wife said, ‘I wish you would just talk to me like I was one of your friends.’ So I said, ‘You’re right. Dude, my wife’s driving me crazy.’” Jimmy challenged Will to an athletic contest, and Will said, “Yeah, let’s go. I can try out my new hip.”

Craig Ferguson: “A man in Texas has created deep-fried beer. And here I am stuck in this tofu hell L.A.” “There’s a new movie called ‘Devil’ about five people stuck in an elevator. I can’t believe they passed up the chance to name it ‘Hellevator.’” “Kids today don’t want to learn anything in movies, except maybe that vampires have feelings too.”

“Role Models” by John Waters
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Best Buy $16.38
or Buy New $16.50

John talks about and interviews his role models.

Page 45 – I have a really good friend who was convicted of killing two innocent people when she was nineteen years old on a horrible night of cult madness. Her name is Leslie Van Houten and I think you would like her as much as I do. She was one of those notorious “Manson girls” who shaved their heads, carved X’s in their foreheads, and laughed, joked, and sang their way through the courthouse straight to death row without the slightest trace of remorse forty years ago. Leslie is hardly a Manson girl today. Sixty years old, she looks back from prison on her involvement in the LaBianca murders (the night after the Tate massacre) in utter horror, shame and guilt and takes full responsibility for her part in the crimes. I think it’s time to parole her.

47 – Later, after Manson was arrested, I drove across the country for the first time in my life to Los Angeles for the California premiere of “Multiple Maniacs,” and the next day began attending the insane LSD medial circus Manson trial, which I’ve never really gotten over.

See Related: STRANGE de JIM’S ZINGERS COLLECTION ARCHIVE

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