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STRANGE DE JIM’S ZINGERS COLLECTION - NOVEMBER 27 2009

STRANGE de JIM’S ZINGERS COLLECTION
NOVEMBER 27 2009

By Strange de Jim
Beep beep! Love from Strange

November wins: O’Brien 5, Leno 5, Colbert 2, Ferguson 2, Letterman 2, Fallon 2, Kimmel 1, Handler 1

Nov. 27 winner Jimmy Fallon: "Botox can also be used to tighten sagging breasts. The only problem is your breasts always look surprised."

Chelsea Handler: "Angelina Jolie is making a movie with Johnny Depp. Her caslapus needs fresh blood." Guest Guy Brennan: "She has a vagina flytrap."

Jimmy Fallon: "We were in the Macy’s Parade. It was great. We were between the Pillsbury Doughboy balloon and the Ronald McDonald balloon. It was things you see when you’re high. And next came the Diabetes balloon."

The Salmon of Doubt: Hitchhiking the Galaxy One Last Time by Douglas Adams, Harmony Books 2002

This book is composed of the best things left on his hard drive after Douglas Adams suddenly died of a heart attack in 2001.

“I love deadlines,” Adams said. “I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.” So there were a lot of unfinished pieces. His quest was always “to put a hundred thousand words in a cunning order.”

I loved this story. Adams was sitting in a cafe with a coffee and a packet of cookies. A respectable man sat down across from him, picked up the packet, tore it open and ate a cookie. Adams was flabbergasted. He took a cookie himself. They alternated. "Finally, when we got to the end, he stood up and walked away. Well, we exchanged meaningful looks, then he walked away, and I breathed a sigh of relief and sat back. A moment or two later the train was coming in, so I tossed back the rest of my coffee, stood up, picked up my newspaper, and underneath the newspaper were my cookies. The thing I like particularly about this story is the sensation that somewhere in England there has been wandering around for the last quarter-century a perfectly ordinary guy who’s had the same exact story, only he doesn’t have the punch line."

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